Just the Tips

Sex Talk with Gay Friends

Two Men in Sillouette

For a guy who considers himself pretty open minded in the bedroom, I tend to get a little shy when talking about the details of my sex life around friends. I love talking sex with friends (the same way I love talking sex with you, here in these posts, dear reader), just not about the sex I’m having with a particularly specified individual.

I don’t consider myself a prude because of this (if I were a prude I wouldn’t get up to the things I get up to in the bedroom, trust me…), but I do tend to compartmentalize my sex life from my non-sex life around those who know me well.

Do I wish I could talk openly to friends about the sex I’m having, like so many people seem to be able to do? I don’t think so. I get uncomfortable listening to others going on about shagging someone I know from a different context — let’s say, if a friend is dating a cousin of mine, I’d prefer not to hear how well said cousin sucks cock, know what I mean?

Here’s what troubles me:

Privacy. Seriously, what I get up to in the bedroom with a certain anyone is nobody’s business. We call upon another side of ourselves, one we (or rather, most of us) don’t flaunt. I can’t ever imagine going out for pizza with my friends and announcing, “So, I started gargling cum” and not have them look at me the same way again.

Betrayal. I know I’m likely closer to my friends than any guy I happen to be shagging at any given time, but I can never quite bring myself to betray a lover by talking to other people about our sex life. I know I wouldn’t want him talking to his friends about us.

Friendships end. Once the what-you’re-like-in-bed line is crossed, it can always be recalled by anyone who knows it. Ever pour your heart out to a friend with whom you subsequently (perhaps even years later) have a falling out? The thought of worrying about that gargling story getting around to your non-hookup circle would be a regretful upset.

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My tight-lippedness doesn’t impede my satisfaction. I get everything I want in the bedroom — consider me a well satisfied sex fiend.

And shoot the shit about sex in general? No probs. Compare war stories? Fine. But share the best way to make me cum twice in row? Fuggitaboutit.

Be safe!

Tell us what you think!

Tell us what you think!

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