How to Build Dating Confidence

We all have our “mirror face”. It’s the look – the persona, even – we compose, most often unconsciously, the instant we step in front of a mirror. It’s the look of how we want others to see us. If only we could take our mirror face with us wherever we go. Alas, real life doesn’t allow us the luxury of tweaking our every move until we get ourselves just right. If you’re a Nervous Nelly about dating, practicing in front of the mirror at home is not the way to go. You gotta get out there. Real world. With your “real face”. (You can’t help but be yourself; that’s who you’re stuck with, so you might as well make it work for you.)

Any confidence issue, dating or otherwise, arises from fear – in this case, of rejection. But the short and simple truth is this: the more you date, the more confident you’ll get. Remember those piano lessons? Same thing.

So how do you manage until you get there, until you’ve dated enough guys that confidence is no longer an issue? Well, believe in the following and it’s bound to take the edge off:

  • There’s a crazy amount of guys out there on the dating scene. The law of averages suggests most of them won’t be a compatible match. That’s not failure, it’s just a bummer. Try again.
  • The other guy could be nervous, too. You’re not the only one under scrutiny.
  • Plan your first dates to be short. It needn’t be a shag hookup. If it’s going poorly, at least you’ll be outta there soon enough.

With enough repetition, you get used to the doings of dating. The unknown goes by the wayside, and fear with it. You eventually start to learn what’s most important to you. You’ll be less caught up in what your date is thinking about you and more in whether or not you’re interested in him. You’ll have more confidence. And it will come across.

I wish there was an easier way. But if you wanna learn piano, you have to practice your scales.

Be safe!

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