This should be easy, an instinct. One of those things we know without knowing we know—like, if you want banana for lunch, you gotta climb the tree.
So if anything on the list below comes as a surprise to you, then, uh-oh, you are just not seeing the basics.
And although the following signs apply more to dating than quick online hookups, there’s definitely overlap.
Long Eye-Contact. And by “long”, I mean a millisecond too long. But it’ll feel like forever. And awkward. That’s good!
Slight touches, maybe on your arm, your knee, maybe your knees touch—just little ones, brushes, quick. Totally good. Soak it up.
Who’s doing all the talking? If it’s him, there are two possibilities:
- He’s a narcissist, and only ever talks about himself (you’ll spot it immediately, and should run…)
- He’s nervous, and can’t control the babble he’s spouting forth… cuz he’s into you! Let it be this one, let it be this one!
No messages allowed. Only the death of his Nana can tear him from hanging on to your every word. Not only will he avoid responding to messages/calls, he won’t even take note of their arrival. You have his full attention.
“The Fake Going-Away Test”. This one’s a naughty short-term fib, but it works. Tell him you might be going away (work, family, whatever) for “a few weeks”, but it’s still up in the air. By this point in the evening, if he’s into you, dropping that sort of bomb will be an obvious disappointment to him. You see the disappointment in his face, hear it in his voice. That’ll swell your heartbones.
Further Commitment. He doesn’t have to say, “Let’s get together again”. He’s completely within his rights to say, “I had a nice time, see ya.” If he does suggest a follow-up, great! But does he:
Handout his Digits or suggest a “Catch ya online”? A phone number is money in the bank. Personal email is just as good. But shield your self-esteem when he fires a “I’m sure we’ll see each other online, right?” your way. He’s looking to lose you in the shuffle.
May you get your hands on every banana you desire!