Gay Dating

Cruising Online without Hooking Up

Sexy Guy on Laptop

Consider this a gentle reminder. To idiots who continue to harass others online.

Not everyone logs on for the sole purpose of hooking up for sex. Yet some users think that if you’re online you’re obligated to connect, or at the very least negotiate.

But having a profile — and logging on —carries no such obligation. There are plenty of reasons why someone might be online but not shopping.

All for fun. Who says we can’t have a profile for the purpose of seeing who’s out there, or learning the lay of the land, or chatting with member friends, or enjoying the pics, or getting ideas, or whatever-whatever? It’s not all about you and your cock.

In a relationship. We may already be happily involved with someone, and have logged on together to get ideas for possible threesomes — in which case we’re not taking calls, we’re fielding them.

Discriminating tastes. You just might not be what we’re looking for. And it’s easy to say, “Well, the least you can do is write back and tell me why you don’t wanna fuck me.” But we have no obligation to do that, either. Law of averages says most profiles won’t be a good match. My friend said it well:  “I can’t tell you how many messages I delete everyday that say nothing more than, Hey, how’s it going?”

Nervous nilly. There are newbies on board. It can take some guys a while before they’re able to make contact. They cruise the site from a distance, sometimes for months, without ever messaging or replying. Be patient. They’ll either get to it or they won’t. In the meantime, move on.

Wanker. I know you bossy boots hate to hear it, but some guys log on for the sole purpose of getting off. They jerk off reading the profiles and stories and looking at the pics. It’s real-time porn, basically. For some guys, it’s the most reasonable form of safe sex.  

None of these guys deserves to be harassed with constant demands for replies. They don’t owe anyone anything.

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Think of it in this context: If you were in a public place, saw a guy who interested you, approached and propositioned him, and he says he’s not interested, would you follow him around the city demanding why not? Making him feel as though he has no right to refuse you?

I hope not.

Be Safe!

Tell us what you think!

Tell us what you think!

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