It’s amazing how divisive the issue of when to have sex can be. Nighttime is obviously when most nasty business is going down, but much of that is practical (we work during the day, we’re out socializing and partying at night, etc.). That doesn’t mean we all prefer it at night.
I certainly do. Night-sex has awesome advantages:
- Dark is sexy. It amps the mood.
- It’s more relaxed (no one’s rushing off to work.)
- You can fall right to sleep afterwards.
- (Let’s be honest) We all look hotter.
Those who’ve told me they prefer morning sex say it’s because they’re actually hornier in the morning. It’s a physiological miracle, as far as I’m concerned. And I have no way to either understand or elaborate on that.
I can, however, wax-unpoetic about morning sex. Y’see, once that evil light comes a-shinin’:
The face of reality greets you like spoonful of castor oil. Who looks decent in the morning? We certainly don’t look as fresh as we did during the previous night’s foreplay. It’s unsettling to say the least.
The mess that was sexy the night before in the morning is simply… well, a mess. The evidence of bodily functions seems more clinical without the accompanying smutspeak.
The smells can be hallucinogenic. From breath to pits to farts, it’s hard to feel horny when you’re forced to breathe through your mouth — which, because of your own breath, you’re not so wont to do.
The sex-hangover is debilitating. If I came three times the night before, I’m in no condition — or mood — to have to perform. It takes energy to fuck and be fucked. Mornings kill me at the best of times.
BUT — I gotta admit I do have a single morning-after ritual: in the quietest, most un-circus-like way, I like the guy in bed with me to wake up with his cock already inside my mouth. It takes little effort or motion (we’re not talking the Nobel-winning blowjob I gave him the night before, or anything) and can even be done under the covers. Besides, nothing starts my day like a serve of warm protein. I may hate mornings, but we all need breakfast. What can I say, I’m an addict.
Otherwise — hands off until at least noon!
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