Picking Up at the Bar: Pros & Cons

Two Men at a Bar

I have a dating handicap: I don’t drink alcohol (no moral reason, my system simply can’t handle it). And I feel very out-of-place (re: annoyed) being in a noisy bar surrounded by drunk people. What a bummer, considering all the fresh meat and hooking up to be found in such an environment.

In all honesty I don’t think it’s the best place to pick-up anyway. It’s an easy place, but not the best. Easy because the prospective hookups are drunk; not the best because the prospective hookups are drunk.

Here are my problems with drunk:

1) Besides the likelihood of being boisterous, drunk guys can have difficulty getting/maintaining wood (not unlike coke snorters – we’ve all heard of “coke dick”, right?)

2) It’s impossible to get a true sense of what the other guy is like. One’s character isn’t at its finest while in one’s cups. I like to know who I’m dealing with.

I have nothing against drinking, I assure you. My judgment isn’t based on that. All my friends – most people, in fact – drink. But meeting someone for the first time when they’re drunk is just off-putting. And hardly sexy.

There’s another disadvantage to bar prowling. So much of it depends on physical appearance. A guy who might be an attractive hit online because of his wit, smarts, and charm might not even be considered by other guys in a bar if he’s not a hot-bod. Or the flipside: guys you’d never consider kissing can look mighty fine after a few vodkas, but you’re left chewing off your own arm just to escape in the morning.

To each his own. I understand the bar scene has always been and will always be popular; I know I’m in a minority here. I can’t even say “I’m old-fashioned that way”, because I’m dissing the most old-fashioned way there is. But I like uninebriated conversation and I like sound judgment (even if it is for choosing whom to fuck). I like to engage – and be engaged – by the mind.

Impress me first. Party with me later.

Be safe!

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