Dental Hygiene and Dating

Man Smiling in Park

Herein lies a topic I feel compelled (again!) to write because clearly not everyone is on board; one which would be considered unsexy for a hookup site were it not for its undeniable truth: healthy dental care is not only sexy, without it you’re a turn-off.

I can’t believe I have to say this:

Brushing your teeth every day is a good place to start. Don’t rank this task alongside laundry or other chores you get around to simply because you’re due. Feel free to be lazy about falling asleep in your clothes, but never go to bed without brushing your teeth.

A stick of gum isn’t enough. This is about more than a quick burst of spearmint — it’s about cleanliness. Carry a brush and paste with you throughout the day. Take my word for it: whenever someone sees me cleaning my teeth while I’m out and about, it’s duly noted how awesome that is. Send a message that being clean is important to you.

Flossing. It’s all about the gums. If you were faced with a choice of having to either only brush your teeth or only floss, flossing is what’ll save you. That’s how you clean the worst bacteria, that’s how you get the smell out. And it’s what ultimately holds your teeth in your mouth — unhealthy, dirty gums loosen your chops, hun.

Dental hygienist. I once dated a guy who was awesome despite his breath. I knew that if I could smell it, surely his friends and colleagues could. But obviously no one else wanted the task of telling him. So of course I did. Not only was he mortified, he confessed he never went to get his teeth cleaned professionally. As soon as he did, the problem went away, simple as that. Do it every six months or you’ll have dog breath.

**IMPORTANT NOTE REGARDING DENTAL CARE AND SEX: You should always avoid brushing and flossing for at least an hour before dishing out anonymous blowjobs. You may temporarily damage your gums enough to put yourself at risk of… well… bad seed. Don’t get too hung up on this, though — your mouth is tough, heals quickly, and an hour should do the trick.

Be safe!

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