Dating Etiquette: No-Shows

Argh! Damn you guys who make a plan to hook-up and subsequently don’t show up! Rest assured, online karma will find its way back to you!

There are plenty of reasons to cancel a hook-up, even at the last minute, and all of them are valid:
—you don’t feel well
—a work emergency has come up
—you’re getting cold feet
—you’re inexperienced, and as a result, a little nervous, so you chicken out
—you got a better offer from another guy (yes, I’ll even accept that one)

The reasons are irrelevant (after all, it’s not like I’m being stood-up by my best friend, for goodness sake—it’s a hookup with someone I just met online, so of course I’ll allow for plenty of leeway).

What’s UNFORGIVABLE is to not show up, after having already committed to do so, and not bothering to formally cancel. It’s inconsiderate, rude, and downright unacceptable in The Rules of Online Dating.  It’s happened to me on more than one occasion, and once again recently.

Know this, you no-showers: we’re onto you. The interwebs is smaller than you think. Having your profile blocked should be the least of your worries (and you will be blocked, I assure you). Word does get around about no-showers. You’ll be discussed, chastised, and ultimately branded. Guys who have heard about you will warn others. Think I’m kidding? You wish. “Online” is a community, and just like in any living community, altruism prevails. We watch out for those around us, and protect each other from whatever might upset the balance of dating-ness, so to speak.

Things come up, shit happens. We understand. But let us know! Make a phone call, send a message, text, put a posting on the message board—whatever! But don’t leave another guy hanging. Or the rope will soon be around your own neck (figuratively speaking, that is—I don’t condone hanging people for real…).

Unless you stand me up again!

For other annoyances, read… First Dates: Please Don’t Turn Me Off!

Be safe!

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